Friday, December 18, 2009 12:36 PM

♥Yesterday met friends & faridah and even dyla. I missed her so much. So yeah , played UNO , webcaming and talk craps.
Off from that place around 6.30 plus due to im working at 7pm.
Workplace darn packed. Fucking busy and im so exhausted.
Ended late yesterday. And as usual slacked as usual place before headed home.
Surprisily , He was there too with Esprit clan. So yeah , act as if nothing happenned. But i can swear that it really killing me deeply. ): hais.
Reached home around 12 plus , showered myself up & off to bed.


Something happened and i myself didnt notice it. I dont blame anyone else or whoever. And i know i wont regret of having this decision. I gotta find my happiness and i know i deserve that. It takes time for everything.
But all i can say thanks for being such a wonderful person.



Second post of the day :
Went out and met him. And i just dont feel good at all.
I dont want to hurt you in the first place and im scared that i will.
I dont want to give you hope or whatever shit that makes you really fall for me.
I dont want things to happen again and again. I dont want to lie to myself.
I dont want to lie what's in my heart all along.
I just can see how sincerity you are towards me but sometimes every night i'll cry cause i dont want to hurt you , boy.
You're nice to me but i cant loved you the way i used to loved mohammad saifudin. Darn ! why is it hard for me to forget about him . FUCK.
I think its better off for me that we're close friends.
Seriously , i cant regards you as my boyfriend.
Its so fast of you asking me to be your gf ? You didnt think that can i move on just like that ? Yes , i know i have to cause its not worth for me. He didnt even think of me and so why should i ? Yes , i know that.
Its been too long im with him , we shared our ups and downs together and making love since two years twelve month. Its not easy for me , babe.
Please understand me and my situation. I have enough of problems already. Please dont add in more. Just give me time to heal everything up and i swear i will. And let time decide what's best for us alright , babe ?
Thanks for making my day just now. Apprieciate it.

Labels: i missed you, still